Is liking your ex's photo at midnight cheating?

6/6/26 | Issue #85

IS "MICRO-CHEATING" STILL CHEATING?

Micro-cheating is the term psychologists use for behavior that stops short of physical or full emotional infidelity but still crosses a line — liking your ex's photos, texting someone you're attracted to, keeping a "just in case" connection warm. It lives in the gray zone where nothing technically happened and yet something clearly did.

A Pew Research survey found 23% of partnered adults say they've hidden a text or social media interaction from their partner. Another 18% say they actively maintain contact with someone they find attractive without telling their partner. Most people who do it don't think it counts. Most partners who find out disagree.

The line between privacy and secrecy has never been blurrier. Which side of it are you on?

Where Do You Stand?

It's Cheating

You Can't Police Attraction

Pick Your Side

POSITION A: It's Cheating

If you'd delete it before your partner saw it, it's cheating. Keeping an ex warm, maintaining a flirtatious dynamic, treating someone else like a backup option while you're in a committed relationship isn't innocent.

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POSITION B: You Can't Police Attraction

Adults have friendships, histories, and attractions that don't disappear when they enter a relationship — and policing every like, follow, and DM is how you turn a partnership into a surveillance state. If your relationship can't survive your partner finding an ex attractive, the problem isn't the ex.